Have you ever seen someone smile with their eyes? It feels like magic. “Without lips or cheeks, those wrinkles are all it takes to convince us that someone is being genuine.” That’s what it said on the Listen-pedia. There’s warmth in those Crow’s Feet - that’s what those wrinkles are called. I looked that up, too.
… I’ve been thinking about eyes a lot lately. But I guess that isn’t so weird. Everyone’s talking about it nowadays, after all. Mom tells me that it’s funny, this is just like how it was when she was young. There was something called a “Phlu”. One of those ones they’ve killed off, like Polio, Small Pocks, or Kancer - in case you haven’t heard of it. Except this wasn’t just any normal Phlu.
It was so strong that it caught everyone off guard, and spread fast. Soon, the whole world was trying to figure out how to deal with this pandemic - that’s what we’re having now, apparently - screaming and shoving and arguing to get an idea of what they should do in all of the panic. Which probably wasn’t the best idea on account of the fact that you can accidentally spit Phlu into someone and they’ll catch it, too. And if most Phlu’s were decent swimmers, this one was Michael Phelps (we learned about him in history class. I’ll tell you about him later). It could swim through the air like nobody’s business. For the first time in a long time, millions of people were dying and the entire world shifted in a radical direction because of a virus.
I did some more research, too, on the Listen-pedia. Lots of other times, these things were contained, like with Ebowla, and most people didn’t really have to care. They could spit in people’s mouths all day long, which must’ve been pretty nice. Spit’s not so bad.
So, yeah. Mom’s seen this kind of thing before. You’d think that she’d be a bit more calm than she is right now, then, right? When I asked her about it, she said, Frankie, I’m too tired right now, and looked away from me. I guess there’s something different about this one. It’s definitely as fast as the super-Phlu she talked about, that’s for sure. But it’s also definitely more mysterious on account of our not understanding how it works. At least, I don’t. All I know is that we have to wear these goggles or else we’ll get it.
That’s the thing about this one. It’s so new that it’s barely got a name since it’s so quick, but they’re calling it Looking Illness. I heard some other names on the Listen-pedia. Watching Disease, the Veyerus, and some forum that likes to be real dramatic calls it Evil Eye Syndrome.
… hey! HEY! GRACE, GIVE THAT BACK!
… mmpfff…. Yeah, that’s right! I’ve got fifteen more minutes, Meemaw said!
Stop crying, Grace…
No, we can’t play hide-and-seek… right now… Yeah, we’ll play later, I promise… … Ok, good. Just let your big bro finish this voice-journal.
Ahem. Yeah, that little stinker certainly hasn’t been taking this situation too well. All cooped up in the house. I guess I should explain. Not that we know much, but it seems pretty simple. It goes like this: if you have Looking Illness and you make eye contact with someone, you’ll give it to ‘em. Scientists have run all sorts of tests, but the rule still stands. Even if you’re watching people through windows or electric screens, if your eyes meet theirs, you’re done for. That was a horrible day, when the streaming channels had to change all of their programs. If any of the contestants so much as glanced into the camera and didn’t know they were contagious, they’d be screwing over millions of people all over the world.
But we can still look at stuff. Any sort of goggle will do, as long as you and the other person can’t see each other’s eyes. We didn’t have any of those special sunglasses that they started to sell on account of them being expensive, but I had a pair of VR goggles that mom got me two years ago that work ok. My friends and I met a few times once the government started to figure out how the Illness worked. Each of us wore our goggles with the passthrough mode on so we could see the world in that weird black-and-white, low-resolution way. Dad took those before he left for his trip, though, so we can’t go outside right now. I was kind of thankful, though. When I was with my friends, everything was wrong. I could see the world, but it just wasn’t right. It was just full of a buncha sleeping people with blocks for heads.
I could see my friends’ smiles, but they looked like lying smiles. Probably on account of the fact that they didn’t have any Crow’s Feet.
My teacher says that there’s something poetic about how Looking Illness changed “the media.” She said that for around 50 years - ever since my mom was born, in the year 2004 - people have been filming themselves a ton. “Communication became visual and spontaneous. People started watching back their lives almost as much as they were living it. You’d make eye contact with your phone, and through it, you’d see countless other people.” My teacher always loves talking about movies and stuff. She sends us decontaminated video - old videos from before Looking Illness so that we can freely watch people looking directly into the camera.
Yeah. It turns out that most of the footage we’ve got from the modern age was full of people that already had the virus, so all that’s been banned. She showed us one about an office, which I just didn’t get. It was literally called “Office.” Apparently, it was supposed to be funny, but it was really boring.
Mom sometimes tells stories about when the first phones came out where you could unlock it with your face. So only you could get in. Funny, huh? I guess that shows how old she is. I mean, what else would you open stuff with? Your ears? One night right when the Looking Illness started, she was on a call with dad after dinner, rubbing her eyes and leaning back in her chair. She looked like she was melting.
I was in the family room with Grace while mom was talking. I heard her talking with him about do you remember how you had to make eye contact with your phone to unlock it? and how amazing that was at the time. How she wishes she looked into more eyes when she was young. At least when we had facemasks, she said, we could still see the important stuff.
She wanted to call him, but they knew that even that wasn’t an option. Dad’s an important businessman, and even with my big bulky goggles, it’s too much of a risk. He doesn’t want to accidentally contaminate mom. So she’s just talking to him. About how she’s sick of making eye contact with her phone but not her kids. I guess I miss her eyes, too.
… COMING!
So, yeah. I guess that’s all I have time for now. I’ll report back when there’s more to say. I want to say that things are looking pretty ok for now, but even inside we’re wearing these old eyemasks that Meemaw found a while ago, “just to be safe”. They’re scratchy and really annoying. And on top of that, I can’t see anything. Which I get is the point, but it stinks. So yeah, things aren’t looking ok. They aren’t looking like anything.
… Recently, I’ve been having trouble being able to tell the difference between being awake and asleep. It’s all dark.
… At least we’re having raviolis for dinner. Frankie Peters, out.